Oh, my sweet readers…I know you were looking forward to another post about “The Art of Happiness” this morning but I sat down to work on it and the next post but found my heart wandering elsewhere. I closed my laptop and decided to take a break for some breakfast, more coffee, and a couple delicious Winternacht cookies that my older son was so cruel to send to me in the mail.
As I sat there, listening to my younger son watch “Clone Wars,” my pen poured out ideas into my journal. I swear it does that, you guys. I’m serious. I sit and look at the page and out come words. Sometimes those cursive sentences are not fit for human eyes. They are uncensored and sometimes very ugly. That’s the process of journaling thoughts as they come up instead of burying them to fester or throwing them out into the world to poison others. I write them as they present themselves in the hopes that seeing them on paper takes some of their power away. It works…usually.
Today was different. These thoughts need to be shared. Maybe I can make them clearer and more useful to myself if I can type them. Maybe you can use them if I do.
There are big changes coming to my home. Those changes were delayed and altered by the reaction to Covid-19, but they are now here big as life. The whole house is feeling it, but unlike my family, my emotions run all along my surface, so I tend to react more than they do. You can usually see how I feel about things without me saying a word. Positive or negative, excited or depressed, love or hate, you know what I’m feeling, but you may not know what it’s about or why. There are many times that I’m not sure either. Let’s just say I’m fun to be around.
So, what are these changes? Every mom reading…hold on to your heart…my youngest is leaving for university in another state.
The empty nest has come.
No need to go into those details. There are movies, books, podcasts, songs, anything you can think of to tell that age old story. But what does it mean to me and you? How will it change our relationship? I know that’s what you’re wondering!
That’s what I’ve been asking myself the past year, and more in the past few weeks as plans became reality. You know what they say, the goal of a mother’s work is to work her way out of a job. My mom career is officially over. What’s next?
I’ve always written and for the past few years, I’ve been working toward writing more and in better ways. This blog was a hobby, then a part-time job, and now that I have no other demands on my attention, it will become my full-time job. I have big plans and I hope you’ll join me for the journey.
What now? I think I’ll change the pace and some of the content of this blog, just a little. I’m becoming burned out writing so much about the books I read. I love it, but there is more that I want to say, and I’d like to work some time into my life for writing more short stories.
I know, “Get to the point, Michelle!” Here’s the schedule I came up with.
- Monday: Gratefulness Post
- Tuesday – Friday: Book Quotes and New Read Posts
- Saturday: Short Story of the Week
- Sunday: Nothing. It’s my day off.
And, of course, there’s the monthly newsletter. That’s a separate special opt-in list! If you’re interested, go to My Autobibliography page to sign up. That’s another something I might put a spin on this month!
I plan to keep writing every morning of the week. I love creating habits and I have morning routine that rocks, when I don’t get derailed by an extra cup of coffee, “Clone Wars,” and brilliant conversation with my family.
I’ll be totally honest here. I’m terrified by the prospect of my last child leaving. What will it be like? Will I go crazy in the house alone all day? Will I drive my husband and friends crazy? Will my blog end up being a non-stop rant about the birds on the porch or the cat on back of the couch?
Change is an inevitable part of life. We’ve trained for this. We’re ready.
Some times those ugly words that pour onto the page are the most beautiful in their honesty. No need to craft them when they convey the emotion you’re truly feeling. I was thinking about ‘schedule blogs’ the other day and I acknowledged I couldn’t do it. I never know what’s going to come out or when, and I don’t have the self control to put a newly completed post on the shelf until that topic area comes up. My oldest left for college this year. The pandemic was a blessing to my wife and me because we got 24/7 access to her for her last 6 months at home. Now she’s back for another 2 months. Plus with texting and facetime, being away at school doesn’t mean the same thing as it did in the eighties when my only contact with my parents was a five minute weekly call on a public pay phone. Great post! Made me think, a lot.
Thanks for your kind words! They made my day. 🙂