When I was a kid, the movie magic and the theater were the domain of my dad. He’d frequently pick us up, go to Thrifty’s for two candies each, and head to the theater for the latest movie. There’s an anecdote about my active imagination that my dad loves to tell. I’ll try to recreate it but remember that it’s far better when he tells the story.
There was a day we were at the movies and, as was our custom, before the movie started, my brother and I would run down the front of the house to explore that big space in front of the screen but before the seats. “Back in my day” you had to show up to the theater early to get a good seat, so we had plenty of time to kill before the previews started.
This time I came running back with my serious face and sat beside my dad leaving my little brother to explore on his own. My dad asked me what was wrong, and I replied that I was afraid of the monsters. My dad scoffed and reminded me that monsters were only in the movies. I turned my six-year-old face to my dad, wide-eyed and dismayed, “Dad! This IS the movies!”
You can’t argue with that. Movie magic comes with movie monsters!
As I grew up, movies with my dad became more and more rare. Teenagers don’t go to movies with their old parents! But I did keep going with my friends until well into my 20’s. As an adult, they fell out of favor. I’m not sure why. It may have simply been the expense of taking the whole family.
Over the past five years, I began to rediscover movie going and was reminded of how much I love the experience…only to have it whisked away by the “pandemic” but theaters are open again and this past weekend a friend asked if I wanted to go.
At first, I jumped at the chance, then I looked at the offerings and wasn’t impressed. There weren’t many movies to choose from and they all seemed lame. But it has been blazing hot this summer and sitting inside a cool, dark theater sounded so nice. We picked a comedy and decided to go on Saturday.
Then I started thinking. Would it be crowded early on a Saturday afternoon? I don’t want to be surrounded by people during normal times, and even more so now. Would there we weird ass restrictions that make me uncomfortable? I’d rather just stay home than jump through hoops so that everyone FEELS safe and really isn’t. Human behavior can make me crazy sometimes.
I decided I was being ridiculous, and it would be better to go out and experience the world, take notes, and make observations in person, than to stay at home and speculate.
I’m glad I did, because people are so damn weird and movie magic is real.
We purchased our tickets online about an hour before the movie started. It’s the kind of theater where you pick your specific seats when you purchase the ticket. I thought that was pretty cool BCB but now it’s even cooler. They can separate people before they get in the theater, put empty seats between groups, because we’re all too collectively dumb to do so for ourselves (insert eyeroll).
When we bought the tickets, we were the first to do so. That was weird. I assumed more people would be buying tickets just before the movie and the theater would be fairly full. I mean, it’s Saturday and over 100 degrees outside…again. I messed up my timing (again) and got to the theater five minutes before showtime to find the theater empty but for one other family, who had bought tickets for seats directly in front of us.
Think about that for a moment. Those people looked at the seat chart, saw that only two other seats in the whole theater were already taken, and selected the seats directly in front of those. Really?!
With the way they build theaters now, sightlines are not a problem. And maybe you’re not that worried about strangers breathing and eating and talking less than three feet above and behind you because you’re vaccinated. But what about personal space and privacy? I get it if the theater is full and those are the only seats available, but the whole theater was empty. Why would you CHOOSE to be that close to other people?
Humans are so strange. I sat down in those seats because I those are the assigned seats I bought, but within a couple minutes the previews started, no one else was coming, so we moved up a couple rows. I laughed in my head the whole time thinking about my Dad and how he always complains that people choose the seat directly in front of you no matter how empty the theater is. I couldn’t wait to tell him.
As a side note, Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard is hilarious. I chose that movie purely by the title and the genre. I assumed it would be as stupid as the title, but it was inside and air-conditioned, so what the hell! I was pleasantly surprised, laughed the whole time, and loved every minute of it.
There was something else interesting that was thinking about while I was at the movies and for several hours after. Things are changing…duh…but not necessarily in a bad way.
I had stopped going to the movies mostly because the hassle of going, the cost, being among a large group of people that (from the story above) seem to have no sense of manners when it comes to movie etiquette. Screaming kids watching clearly inappropriate movies, sick people over my shoulder, talking people, etc. Why spend that much on a movie when I can sit a home and watch them on my big screen with a beer and chips? The ability to pause when I have to go to the bathroom? Yes, please!
Moving my watching time to earlier in the day, before 2pm, helped a tremendous amount. Why is it that no one goes to the movies at 11am or 1pm? We had been going on Christmas day for the latest release of Star Wars and walking into an empty theater for years. Walking out, we’d see a long line of people waiting for the late afternoon showings. Crazy.
I was bored with the selection of movies at one point. It seemed there were only action movies and coarse and crude comedies. I was so completely disappointed with first Hobbit movie, that I never went back to see the next one. There’s no dialog, no depth of meaning or character, just chase, chase, explode, and kill. It’s exhausting. And loud.
We chose to stay home to watch movies instead and I love the new streaming movies. There are so many new limited series shows based on books, history, etc. It’s awesome. Traditional movies have to be made to fit a niche: a time frame people can sit through in one stint and that a large swath of people will watch. A two-to-three-hour movie has to leave a lot of details out to get the story told. And it has to be made so that as many people as possible will watch to be profitable, so it’s catered the lowest common denominator.
It’s expensive for a theater to show a movie, so they need as many people there as possible. Streaming movies are cheaper to distribute, so they can be made for a smaller market. Limited series shows based on books or history, can be as long as they want. And now we have movies that cater to a very specific audience. It’s awesome.
But something is missing for me. Where’s the movie magic?
When The Force Awakens came out, something strange happened to me. This was the first movie I’d seen in a theater in years. When those yellow words started scrolling up the screen and the music began, I got a chill. I could feel the energy around me. And when the whole theater gasped in excitement to relive old memories and see the continuation of a story that we had all grown up with…it was movie magic. A collective memory, we were all connected emotionally. It felt…primal. I’m tearing up just writing about it.
The best part of that movie was the fact that we were all sitting there watching it together. Like watching your favorite band perform live or a live performance of a play, we are experiencing something together and for a moment we had a bond with our fellow humans. It was weird.
Right now, I’m reading “The Righteous Mind” and he’s talking about humans and how their evolved edge over all the other animals is their ability to work together, to trust each other (as in The Rational Optimist), and to bond into large groups of non-family. This is what has made us thrive and spread out over the world, to master our environment, and create technology that makes us fatter and happier than any other species. Call me crazy, but I think the movie magic is an extension of that.
I remember huge movie houses when I was a kid, packed full, shoulder to shoulder with little leg room, to watch a giant screen. The last movie I saw like that was Jurassic Park at the Cinedome in Anaheim. This movie was HUGE and was touted as having huge sound that had to be “experienced,” so we went there. It was amazing. You could feel those dinosaurs walking and hear them coming up behind you.
Those huge movie theaters are gone, I know, and that’s ok because their replacement is so much more intimate and comfortable. Smaller theaters, with comfortable recliners, tiered up so no one’s view is obstructed. Seats far enough apart that you don’t get kicked in the back by the long-legged dude or coughed on by the squirmy kids behind you. It’s fantastic.
But ticket sales had started to fall BCB, and I hope after being closed for over a year, they don’t continue that trend and theaters close forever.
There’s just something about the collective experience that I had forgotten was so special. The arrival, the popcorn, the finding of your seat. The lights dimming, the previews we watch and then look at each other for a thumbs up or down. The movie itself with the collective laughs, gasps, and painful silences. And then the end: the applause, the standing and stretching, walking from the theater laughing or crying, the looking to other patrons with the “Did you feel that?” look. It’s movie magic.
Social status, trade, and trust, oh my!
By Michelle Huelle
On June 26, 2021
In Book Quote Commentary
Social status, trade, and trust are the first three things I’m riffing on from The Rational Optimist. Humans are so very fascinating.
There’s just so much to talk about in this book! It’s riveting and not a slog to read at all. It’s fun and light and changes your perspective. I am happy that I decided to re-read it.
At first, I thought, “I’ll summarize each chapter so everyone can get the info in here!” Nah, that’s boring. Then I thought maybe I’d just take a line or two from each chapter. Too many posts. A line or two from two chapters? Still too much. Screw it. How about a line that made me say, “Yeah, dammit!” That sounds doable.
Here’s something to chew on.
“Why, asks Geoffrey Miller, ‘would the world’s most intelligent primate buy a Hummer H1 Alpha sport-utility vehicle’, which seats four, gets ten miles to the gallon, takes 13.5 seconds to reach 60mph, and sells for $139,771? Because, he answers, human beings evolved to strive to signal social status and sexual worth.”
This book was written in 2010, so the signals have changed dramatically, in some circles, but there are still signals and there always will be. One generation, subculture, and such, won’t understand another’s and call them crazy, selfish, obnoxious, and/or old school evil. Humans are so strange.
“Trade is often unequal, but still benefits both sides.”
I always find it odd that someone outside an exchange believes they can tell whether the exchange is beneficial. If it weren’t, they wouldn’t have completed the exchange. Are you saying one side is too feeble minded? They can’t understand their own wants and needs and need to be taken care of by their betters?
If I come to you with something that is easy for me to get or make and say, “I’ll give you four of these if you give me two of those awesome things that I can’t make for myself.” You’re laughing inside thinking, “What a goof! These things are everywhere or are easy to make.” I’m thinking the same about you. We both walk away thinking we won.
The same goes for labor. My son, when he was young, was asked by a neighbor to come clean his yard each week and do a few chores. He’d give him $50 each week to do this. My son jumped at the opportunity. As a parent, I realized that he’d be working there all day, probably nearly ten hours in the heat. That’s $5 an hour, not worth it to me. But to a twelve-year-old? That’s some serious cash. I didn’t interfere. He’s free to exchange his time and labor for whatever he thinks is fair.
A few weeks into the job, he realized how much time he was spending there and asked for a raise. The neighbor thought his work was worth the money and started giving him $100 a week. He knows the value of his own time and effort and was willing to exchange it for that price.
Should someone step in and stop this exchange? Apparently, most of us say yes.
About a year later, my son found other things that were worth more to him than that $100 a week. And when he turned 16, he found “legal” (insert eyeroll) work that paid him more. That job lasted until he decided he had enough, his time was worth more, so he went in search of someone that felt the same way.
If he hadn’t found anyone that believed his work was worth more, he would have had to change his work, build new skills, or lower his expectations. Forcing someone by law (violence) to exchange at a pre-fixed rate is wrong and creates more problems.
Ok, enough of that. Moving on.
“Famously, no other species of ape can encounter strangers without trying to kill them, and the instinct still lurks in the human breast.”
Ha ha! No shit, right? Humans do this really weird thing called trust. We invented it. All other animals only build trust within a family. Trust is what lets us trade things with other people. And when we don’t trust, that’s when things start to get ugly.
I think we’re in a pretty low state of trust at the moment and the government, with the help of our media, is taking advantage of that. THOSE people are out to get you. THEY get more. THEY want to hurt you. And it’s coming from both Democrats and Republicans in the US. Why? I’m not sure, but I bet I has something to do with staying in control since that’s the only commodity a government has.
In my town this past year, I’ve seen more and more “Go Back to LA” stickers and they make me sick. I’ve been told that it is in response to the wave of people from the city moving out into rural areas and “taking over.” How dare they? This is OUR turf. They don’t belong here. The crazy part is that I’m hearing it directly from people who also moved out here to escape city life a bit, like me.
I live near a National Park and a Marine base. Everyone here is from out of town. The area relies on it and wouldn’t exist if not for those attractions. This “Go Back to LA” slogan is only another wall between me and my neighbors, and the tourists that come here to visit and vacation. And what about those few souls that feel drawn to this place and come here to build a life for themselves? How do they feel when they see those? I’ve talked to a few. They’re afraid of their neighbors.
If trust is that low in a neighborhood, between friends, at businesses, and online, can you imagine what it is up the chain? How about banks, investors, and government officials; those people that keep this giant machine we’ve created going, the ones with the money and guns and the law to back them? This is how trade slows. This is how people starve. This is how wars start and are supported. This is how people die.
How can we help? I think it starts with turning off the news and maybe even dropping social media for a while. It’s a lot easier to relax when you’re not bombarded with bad news messages at every moment of every day.
Everyone on this planet has the power to start being nicer, assuming positive intent, and trusting the people around us. We can do our best to take care of ourselves, our families, and one other person, maybe even two. Your neighbor isn’t a monster. That person at the grocery store you haven’t seen before isn’t trying to horn in on your game. He’s just a guy trying to get through this world just like you.
Maybe we can create some new “social status” cues, like being kind and generous in person instead of putting a special frame on our social media profile.
Want to read more posts about this book? Pop back to my first post, The Rational Optimist: New Read. You’ll find my first thoughts about the book and links to any follow-up posts there.
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